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Drama Queens of the Jungle

Mark C

No, its not the name of a new Charles Busch play. Its 5 challenging houseplants that demand a commitment to nurture at home


Last week I posted about easy-care houseplants. Now, its time to look at the other end of the spectrum. In my experience the five offenders below are "greenhouse traps." They look great when raised under perfect conditions but soon after you get them home the drama begins.


Schefflera

A variegated umbrella tree plant. Photo by Teona Swift
A variegated umbrella tree plant. Photo by Teona Swift

Commonly referred to as an umbrella tree plant, schefflera captivates with its attractive foliage and tall, upright form. However, its demanding nature can challenge even experienced indoor gardeners. After losing a few of these temperamental plants last year, I went on vacation to Florida. Upon arrival, I immediately noticed the widespread use of schefflera in local gardens and landscaping. Yet, upon closer examination, many of them seemed quite underwhelming. Their mass planting masked the fact that numerous individual specimens had sparse, lackluster leaves. Here's my takeaway: If a plant struggles to thrive even in nearly ideal conditions, it's unlikely to succeed back home in Pennsylvania.

Instead, try this: While dieffenbachia (dumb cane) can also be particular about watering, it's easier to manage. Maintain moist but not waterlogged soil to prevent root rot, and a dieffenbachia could become the showy focal point you're seeking.


Ivy

Ivy climbing a wall
Ivy climbing a wall

Hold on a second. Ivy? It grows everywhere. If you have some on your property, you've probably noticed that it seems tougher to kill than to grow. So how does ivy make it onto a list of challenging houseplants? For starters, the ivy growing outside is of a type well-suited to your climate, and if you're in a cold climate, it typically dies back or becomes dormant in the winter. Additionally, ivy will send its roots deep into the ground to satisfy its nearly insatiable thirst. However, if you have ivy as an indoor plant, you're likely dealing with a much more delicate variety that still shares the same need for resources.

Instead, try this: Scindapsus is a genus that includes a variety of easy-care climbing plants that can adapt to a wide range of conditions. Provide it with a trellis or other support and let it climb, or place it in a hanging pot to showcase those long cascading vines and mottled foliage.


Calathea

Rattlesnake plant
Rattlesnake plant

Those beautiful leaves, elegantly slender and adorned with stunning stripes and patterns, standing upright and showcasing their splendor... Don't be deceived! Calathea is a true drama queen. While it's easy to maintain tropical plants in a greenhouse, be cautious before bringing this challenging house guest home. "I'm cold, I'm thirsty. Does anyone else feel it's dry in here? I only drink distilled water." Seriously! In their defense, some varieties might be worth the effort and are less demanding than others (consider the rattlesnake plant). You can keep them alive in less-than-ideal conditions, but for them to truly thrive, be ready to put in some effort.

Instead, try this: ZZ plant (Zamioculcas zamiifolia) is one of the easiest houseplants to maintain. Its glossy oval leaves, ranging in color from bright green to nearly black, line tall stalks and rarely wither or fall. It adapts to various conditions and even makes a great "office plant."


Ferns

Fronds of a potted fern. Photo by Aliona Zueva
Fronds of a potted fern. Photo by Aliona Zueva

What? First ivy and now you're going after ferns? But I adore my Boston fern, and it's quite easy to care for. Okay, I'll concede that point. However, if you're planning to bring home some of the more delicate varieties (like maidenhair or button leaf), be prepared for some crispy leaves. I refer to this as the "water trap." What's the quickest way to kill a plant? Too little water. Next quickest? Too much water. Plants that require high moisture in their natural habitat can create a dilemma at home, where pot sizes and limited drainage make maintaining the right balance challenging.

Instead, try this: Transform your living room into a jungle with dracaena. With dozens of colorful and uniquely shaped species, this genus can bring variety and diversity to your home. Simply water them regularly and provide a bit of extra light in the winter by moving them closer to a window or using a grow light during the darkest months.


Kroton

Close up of a colorful kroton leaf
Close up of a colorful kroton leaf

Wow! What a showstopper! With its almost psychedelic leaves in vibrant autumn colors, kroton can knock your socks off. Make sure to admire them on your next visit to the greenhouse. Then, leave them there. Is it temperature, humidity, water, fertilizer, or light that's the issue? Yes, all that. Honestly, here in the northeast, I've never had one survive the winter. While I'm confessing, I must admit that I still occasionally buy one, but I think of it like a poinsettia. It's going to look great for a few weeks or months, then it's slowly going to become a stick with a withering leaf attached. If Charlie Brown picked out a houseplant, this would surely be the one.

Instead, try this: Rubber tree plants (Ficus elastica) are now available in some unexpected colors and textures and can grow to ten feet tall in a home environment. Use pruning and supports to grow them in a tree form or let them bush out.


But what is life if not a learning experience? Feel free to experiment with these challenging plants. You might discover that the conditions in your home are more favorable for success than mine. My top advice for beginner houseplant enthusiasts is not to fear killing your plant; you'll likely learn something from it. And don't worry, nature and your local greenhouse will make more. 🪴


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